|This is how I feel....(thanks for posing, Matilda)|
Preparations for leaving in a few days are not going so well. Murphy's law is in effect. Both Nastia and I are experiencing extreme anxiety. Her PTSD symptoms have resurfaced, and even a really helpful therapy session today didn't alleviate the major symptoms. I'm starting to have those creeping mother doubts -- What am I doing to my daughter? How can I disrupt her life like this? What kind of damage am I inflicting my taking her so far out of her comfort zone when she is finally doing so well? -- These are the thoughts that are dominating my mind today.
Also, three house-sitter/dog-sitters fell through. I may have to have my friends coordinate a revolving schedule of sitters, like they did in January. I feel so sad about it. I wanted to leave knowing the animals were in really good hands. Right now there are NO hands. All four of them sense our anxiety and are acting up like crazy...barking incessantly, Tink peeing in inappropriate places, Matilda chewing things she shouldn't...Puck biting us when we try to pet her. It's not so good.
Also....what in the world possessed me to plan a booksale/yardsale three days before we leave? It's 11pm and I have hours of prep to do for the sale, and I need to be up by 7am. And did I mention the house is being prepped for painting? Six men on ladders pounding on the house from 7:30am till 4pm for the last two days? No, I am not responsible for the time frame. I wouldn't do that to myself. I rent, so this was the landlord's schedule.
Anyway, I guess this whiny vent is really a plea for prayers. I feel awful asking when I feel so many people are doing so much to help me already. But, if you're new here and you don't feel imposed upon by me yet, maybe you'll take us on, and pray for us tonight and tomorrow? I'd like that. Alot.