RAD Is Not A Life Sentence...

What a beautiful day we had yesterday, a day out of time. Just me and my girl celebrating her birthday together. And something occured in that gift of a day that lit up my heart like a forest fire:

We were driving to buy the biggest lego box she could find at Target. All the windows of the car were open, the wind was wild and giddy, and her current favorite cd was in the cd player (The Spring Standards, if you're curious).

She was singing along with her eyes closed and the most wonderful look of contentment spread across her face. At some point she opened here eyes and took a penny out of the middle console in the car. She held it up and said, 'God, thank you for this last year! This wish is that next year is the best year of ever and ever!' She tossed the penny out the window into the woods near the golf course.

'Honey, last year was a good year for you, wasn't it? I can't even imagine what amazing things this year is going to bring your way.' I wanted to acknowledge this moment of self-awareness

'No, mom, that's not what I was saying. That wish wasn't for me, it was for the whole world."

Her empathy caught me off guard. This? My daughter? Reaching outside the walls of her self, in praise? I felt my eyes welling up. She went on to explain to me that she knew that the world 'wasn't doing so well these days' and that lots of people were suffering -- losing homes, struggling to buy food, pay bills.

'I want God to take care of everybody this year, not just me.'

And with that, it was gone...the fear, the deep soul-ache, the hypervigilance, that darkness in her heart. For a moment I was given the most beautiful glimpse of my daughter outside of the prison that RAD ever holds her in. She was free, she was hopefilled , and she was holding the world in her hands.